All the best coffeeshops in Amsterdam, rated by Lilly’s tumultuous temper!
Hello and welcome to another fantabulous Lilly Likes coffee shop review. We have taken it upon ourselves to tour the Dam, taking in all the best points and offering explanation of what they are, why they exist, and how you can go see them. Coffeeshop Smokey is but one in a long line of coffeeshops in Amsterdam that we have reviewed.
With this in mind, don’t forget to learn all about the Dam Square, browse through some of our other coffeeshop reviews, or find your next ideal vacation, all with a little Lilly Likes help. We’re a good bunch deep-down. We just happen to be 420 friendly.
Now that the customary introductions are out of the way, let’s focus that microscope in on Smokey’s. Where, who, what and when? We have the scoop if you have the patience…
Atmosphere and Vibe
If you have ever been to Amsterdam and spent a few days wandering around, not really sure where you are, then you will recognise Smokey’s as the one with Betty Boop on the walls. There is an eclectic mix of street art, graffiti styles, and funky ethereal imagery all over this place. Through the day, it looks refined. At night, it looks like a coffeeshop that is trying to be a nightclub.
What does this mean to you and me? It doesn’t have great lighting but that is kind of for the best in coffeeshops! It has a great style to it that makes you dream of the city around it, and the owners evidently have a lot of respect for stoner culture.
We had to give them a 4.5 out of 5 for atmosphere and vibe. It’s a bit more hectic at night than we are used to. The neon signage is a little too much – but we have nothing against Betty Boop – who, by the way, was a WOC.
Munchies and Drinks
The next category determines the state of a coffeeshop’s drinks and snacks. We certainly weren’t disappointed in Smokey’s when it came to food and drink. They have plenty of snacks if you like things sweet, an option of brownie or muffin in the edibles section, and some of the best looking hot chocolate in town.
Don’t forget that this place has more than 150 seats in it, so it does busy- up fairly quick on the weekends. Another downside to their munchie and drink options is the speed of the service at those key busy times of the year. They have plenty of cake to go around though… and that hot chocolate really is to die for. You will also find all the hot and cold drinks you would expect of a coffeeshop of this calibre. We gave them 5 out of 5 for the munchies and drinks category because we believe a good hot chocolate is as essential as a good selection of weed strains. Call us old fashioned, it’s just how we roll.
And now, the category you have all been waiting for, the one thing that all Amsterdam coffeeshop pilgrims have in common… the love of weed. What strains will you find in Smokey’s? What is there to look forward to in terms of pre-rolled joints, and how are the prices? We summarised a tasty sample below:
- A variety of haze weed, including Lemon Haze, Pineapple Haze, Amnesia, and others.
- Candy Kush, a favourite among those that like sweet buds.
- L.A. Confidential – a strain that has been around for so long it has a following all of its own.
- Buddha Cheese which we understand is like Cheese but much stronger.
- Jack Herrer, the old cannacup winner.
- Bubble gum – because they have a sweet tooth.
- Hashish choices include Super Polm, Ketama, Power Afgaan, and Royal Cream.
- Pre-rolled without tobacco come as white widow, Pure Widow, Haze, Candy Kush, Pure Haze or Pure Cheese.
- Pre-rolled with tobacco brings you a choice of White Widow, Super Polm, Weed/Hash blend, Royal Cream, Cheese, or 5 White Widow… and we don’t even know why it is five.
- To top all of that off they have a hash brownie or a hash muffin choice, both priced at a reasonable 8.50€
They actually have fairly good prices for a place that is as large and tourist friendly as Smokey’s. Prices start at under ten euro and work their way up, depending on strain and volume. Go along and see for yourself, the selection is fairly fine.
We gave them 4.5 out of 5 for choice of strains. We feel the menu is a little skewed towards the sweeter, fruitier weeds. There’s nothing wrong with this, it’s just that nothing on their menu is known for being a smooth smoke. It might be an area they could improve.
On to the merchandise! Some coffeeshops in Amsterdam make café merch almost as big in sales as smokables. Unfortunately, Smokey’s isn’t one of them. For the most part, they are focused on the products they sell and on keeping a steady footfall into their 100+ seating space. The rent on somewhere that big has to be paid somehow.
What this ends up doing is stopping them from selling a whole range of themed products Other coffeeshops are catching the tourist trade with t-shirts, baseball caps, or hoodies. The only thing you will find in Smokey’s that’s customised is a roach board or skins packet. It’s not an essential category, but we always feel those that are skipping out on merchandise are missing a whole load of online funding.
We gave them a 3 out of 5 for café merchandise because they only have the basics. Set up an online shop and we will review.
Lilly Likes Verdict
What else is there to say but that no one person can judge which coffeeshop in Amsterdam will be your favourite. All we can do is give you a rundown of each one and leave it to you to decide.
Lilly Likes found Smokey’s to be filled with friendly – if busy – staff, to have ample weed choice, and good edibles. We also admire them for their hot chocolate, even if their décor reminds us of an old 90’s nightclub… not that we are old enough to have seen one of those.
Smokey’s scored a respectable 18 out of 20. It’s on the touristy side of great, but we love it anyway. We hope you readers do too.